When I Was An Agent...

Management loved that line.

"When I was an agent, I was pulling fifty cash orders a week, EVERY WEEK!"

"When I was an agent we weren't allowed to get picked up unless we had ten on the day"

"When I was an agent I was positive and happy all the damn time!!"

I could honestly go on forever. Management loved to remind us of what shitty agents we were by comparing our work to their successful hay days.

I'm sure we could all pull fifty orders a week, every week, if the internet still hadn't been invented and if the country wasn't on the verge of a recession. When did you knock doors, Manager? Twenty years ago! Gosh golly, people were still using pagers and rocking jerry curls back then.

Management never let us forget that we were never going to be anything other than amoebas-on ticks-on fleas because we weren't selling on the level they were when they were agents.

In case you haven't figured it out, anything short of shitting gold bricks was not even remotely impressive to management. Even if you shat a brick of solid gold, they would tell you to fuck off until you could shit a platinum one.

Why would you strive to be the best if "the best" isn't good enough?

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